If you can't tell, I'm annoyed with my neighbors.

Well it's that time again. Time to ignore Daley's stories and the annoying neighbors and time to update the blog.

On the way to Salt Lake today I noticed several people swerving around something in the road ahead. As I approached I realized it was one of those plastic snowmen placed in yards for decoration. I didn't believe it at first because it was quite a weird sight. Then I began to think about schizophrenic people and how difficult driving would be for them. You see some guy swerving around invisible obstacles in the road and you know he is just thinking, "These leprechauns better get out of the road or someone is going to get hurt. Ah! There's that elephant again!" Must be a scary but interesting experience for them. That was a random tangent. Back on track.

I got to the dorm and found a refrigerator in the bathroom, an annoying amount of bass emitting from the neighbors room, a notice saying Daley and I forgot to lock our window, and a clean bathroom. Well that's college ya know? Everything is unexpected. I'm glad to be back in school. I've missed my friends and living in Salt Lake. I'll even get over having to live with Daley. Someday.

Before leaving for the break Daley "accidentally" poured cereal ALL over the place. Well mostly on my rug and behind the refrigerator (the one in the room not the bathroom). I personally think it was on purpose but all personal vendettas aside, I decided that it needed to be cleaned up. Rather than going to the housing office and renting a vacuum I just bought a little Dirt Devil. Daley and I are pretending it's a Dyson because we long to be classy. But anyway after spending way too long assembling the damn think I plugged it in and turned it on for the maiden voyage. I was overly excited about the vacuum. Daley was less than ecstatic but that's just her personality. Boring. After vacuuming I realized why the spokespeople on infomercials are always so coked up on the products they are selling. I want to create an infomercial for this little Dirt Devil. Keep reading and I'll throw in a couple extra sentences for FREE. Just pay separate processing and handling. (Just getting some practice in.)

Feeling guilty about eating that extra cookie? Or maybe you are looking for some disgustingly bad-for-you recipes? Whatever your reason you should check out this site Daley just showed me: http://www.thisiswhyyourefat.com/ It's an instant way to make you feel a little better about yourself. Unless one of the pictures is from your own kitchen. In which case you're basically famous so screw all those haters! This is my favorite mostly because the three Pabst cans. So classy.

Doughnut Pizza + 3 beers = Gastric Bypass surgery!

I take no ownership of this picture. It belongs to some fatty.

As usual I will leave you with some words of wisdom to ponder until next time you feel bored enough to return. First, if you're my neighbor turn down your bass on your sound system. You're not impressing anyone with your shitty quality speakers turned up loud. Second, remember that if you sing in your car when you're alone, other people can still see you. And it's damn funny. Third, don't be afraid of constructive criticism. It hurts but it helps.